Mental Capacity

Sometimes I think it would be funny to convince people that I'm crazy. This generally occurs when I catch myself doing something that a crazy person would do. Such as muttering to myself, laughing out loud when nothing funny happened, making awkward eye contact with someone because you either thought that they were looking at you, or that you knew them, or answering my text messages out loud. Actually, I do these kinds of things quite frequently. I have this problem where sometimes I get so into my thought process that halfway through it, I will say the climax of my thought out loud. That's kind of weird. I won't even deny it.

For example, one time when I was working for Red Robin, I was the only hostess with a drivers license, and coincidentally a car. Therefore I was the errand girl. I bought crayons, whipped cream, and an occasional Rock Star for the cooks. One week, Red Robin seemed to run out of something at least once a day, and I was called upon to make the Harmon's run. I was pondering this, and after an afternoon of "Hello, welcome to Red Robin! Have you tried the Whiskey River BBQ Burger?" my brain was desperate for some stimulating thoughts. So naturally I began to dissect my current state. I was slightly concerned because I was becoming such a regular shopper at this Harmon's grocery store that people were going to start to know me by name. Then, in my 17-year-old nonsense, I began to feel self conscious about always wearing the same thing there. (Which was nonsensical, becuase it was a uniform. It's okay. I was young and impressionable.) Anyways, I remember thinking long and hard about this. Luckily I came to the conclusion that it was a good thing that I owned two different colors of my Red Robin shirt. Therefore, they would not think I was so homeless-looking and poverty stricken. Now, here's the problem. Upon making this realization, I said this outloud while in the midst of a busy Harmon's parking lot: "Good thing I have two shirts or else they would think I was a hobo." Upon this declaration I recieved several looks that clearly questioned my mental capacity. I don't blame them. Maybe they didn't think I was a hobo, but they surely thought I was unstable. It's fine.

Again, I will admit that this is weird. But alas, it happens, and one day not too long from now I will not correct myself. I will not conform to the social norms. I will convince some innocent passerby that I am legitimately crazy. And then I shall laugh. Thank you, and goodnight.