Business Up Front, Party in the Back

I have an FHE brother who is pretty cool. Pretty cool indeed. His name is Stanford. Stanford is from California and likes to surf. Stanford has also reached the "Awesome" status due to the fact that he has in fact successfully grown a mullet. Confession Session: Mullet's are awesome, but they stress me out. There is something so unnatural, and so 1980s about them that it makes me cringe. Now Stanford explained to me how it gets to be a pretty stressful feat sporting such a do. He apparently has to worry about outside forces such as static. "You can't have a staticy mullet. No one wants that!" To this, I promptly laughed out loud. Then Stanford, in all his awesomeness tried for the better part of three minutes to get me to run my fingers through his mullet. To this, I promptly refused. Adamantly. I think he got over it, but to get back at me he started rubbing his mullet all over my arm. To this, I promptly screamed. It's fine. Bless Stanford in all his awesomeness, and his mullet. Thank you, and goodnight.