This is Why I'm Smart:

Here are a few things I know. These things make me smart. Ready, go:

• Jamba Juice makes everything better.
• John Mayer's Battle Studies is brilliant.
• I am absolutely terrified of my garage.
• Tylenol PM is my ultimate panacea.
• The atonement is real.
• Laughter is my favorite form of exercise.
• Broken hearts suck.
• Coldplay says what I feel.
• I am 87% sass.
• Centerville Beach is my "Somewhere Only We Know" place.
• Libby's is the best kind of pumpkin.
• Painting is therapeutic for me; also coloring.
• Slippers are among the most comforting things in this known world. That and kisses on the forehead.
  
• I hate MLA.
  
• Red Curry at the Thai place in Fortuna is too hot; Red Curry at the Thai place in Rexburg is just right.
• Driving past the Bay on 101 is my favorite part of my day.
• I hate texting.
• Alligators open their mouths to regulate their body heat. (Or something like that.)
• Facebook steals my sleep.
• My dream for my life changes twice daily.
• George Clooney is the modern version of Cary Grant.
  
• Being an optometrist would be sweet, because you could look at eyes all day long.
  
• Engagement pictures are funny. And mostly awkward.
• If ever you attempt to do laundry in the Mountain Pines laundry facilities, first of all don't, and second of all, NEVER use powder detergent.
• 98% of all men are babies. (No offense.)
• I can successfully operate a turnstile.
• Sometimes I think in terms of blogs and John Mayer lyrics.
  

This is why I'm smart. Thank you, and goodnight.

Such a Girl

Okay, so I don't like to admit this, but it needs to be done. Sometimes, I really am a pansy. I know, you are probably all shocked...or something... but it's true. Why do I bring said weakness up? Because a few recent trips to the gym have reminded me of what a girl I am. Lately, every time I got to the gym I stop half way through due to the fact that I am about to pass out. Now I would like to tell you that it's because I have had such an awesome workout and am achieving the status of "fully awesome." False. I am achieving the status of "fully lame," and it's kind of pissing me off. Not gonna lie. This whole working out thing didn't use to be an issue. I used to be able to work out for an hour and feel nothing but the sweet rush of exhaustion and endorphins charging through my body. Now, not so much. As I peel myself off of the machines, stumble over to get some water, and sit down with my head between my knees I feel nothing but defeat and frustration. What the St. Francis? Why do I fail at life?

One possible conclusion is that this past semester I had an awesome social life, which equals a not so awesome exercise routine. Another possible factor for my failure is that I did this thing called stop eating. Which was kind of bad. Not intentionally though; I'm not anorexic. Promise. I just hate eating; it takes up way too much time, and it's such a hassle. But apparently your body needs foods and nutrients. Whatever. So maybe I'm nutrient deprived, and my body can't handle running at freaking 6 miles an hour. What the heck? Suck it up body. Suck it up.

So now I'll just try to re-build my endurance and my pride, and complete a full work out without having to stop and rest like a girl... Pray for me. Thank you, and goodnight.

Dear Future:

Dear Future,

Please bless that I marry someone dashing. Sort of a Cary Grant figure. That would be great. Thanks.

Your Truly,

Emmilie

Thank you, and goodnight.

Singles Ward

Almost two years ago today, I attended my first singles ward. This does not include college wards. That's another story in an of itself. Now, I have been to a few since then, but this ward in Arizona was my first. That was a funny time of life. I had just finished my first semester of college, and was home in Prescott for four months. That was back when I was still pretty socially awkward, and can you believe it? Shy... Truth. It was also a time of life when I was still trying to figure out who I was, and find peace with it. Ah, the joys of youth. It's fine. Today, I will be going to yet another singles ward. It's slightly entertaining to me this time, seeing how much I have grown up. Now I just don't bloody care what people think of me. It's totally awesome. It also helps that I will be leaving in about a month to go serve the Lord, so it doesn't really matter how people perceive me. I do what I want, fools. Eat it. How cool is it to be able to see your progression? I love that. I also love the fact that I know that I can engage people in conversations without being awkward. That is also wonderful. Thank you, Orlando for teaching me ward social skills. Now, when you read this don't get the impression that I was a menace to society just two short years ago. False. But anyone who knew me then and knows me now will admit that I've shed that awkward sweater. Now sometimes I put it back on for fun. You know, strictly nostalgic purposes. It's fine. But for the most part I am a capable and confident adult. So eat it sucka.

It also helps that I have had some experience in singles wards, as well as those nonsensical college wards. I know who to avoid, who NOT to hit on, and who to flirt with shamelessly. It's great. I also highly love how every singles ward is essentially the same, and you know what to expect. This time I will probably meet a hippie or two. I heart you, Arcata. Thank you, and goodnight.

Essence of Emmilie

Sometimes there are lyrics to songs that describe my life, or more realistically, my outlook on life. They speak to my soul, and help me to find the words to explain how I feel. In essence, these lyrics are Emmilie.

So come over, just be patient and don't worry.

Anything less than "I love you" is lying.

Do I have to fall asleep with roses in my hands?

Oh what good is it to live with nothing left to give, forget but not forgive, not loving all you see?

Maybe when things turn green again it will be good to say you know me.

Oh love, don't let me go. Won't you take me where the streetlights glow? I can hear rain coming, like a serenade of sound, now my feet won't touch the ground.

It's a hard, it's a hard, it's a hard, oh it's a hard, it's a hard rain, gonna fall.

This is the deep and dying breath, this love that we've been working on.

I noticed tonight that the world has been turning while I've been stuck here dithering around.

I know the heart of life is good.

Monday you can fall apart, Tuesday, Wednesday, break my heart Thursday doesn't even start, it's Friday I'm in love.

I could write a song, a hundred miles long, well that's where I belong and you belong with me.

I get by with a little help from my friends.

Tears stream down your face; I promise you I will learn from my mistakes. Tears stream down your face And I...will try to fix you.

I never meant to cause you trouble; I never meant to do you wrong.

If only I don't bend and break, I'll meet you on the other side; I'll meet you in the light.

The sun is up; the sky is blue; it's beautiful, and so are you.

I could write it down, and spread it all around; get lost and then get found, not swallowed in the sea.

I'm the hero of this story, don't need to be saved.

This is my life. My life is beautiful. Thank you, and goodnight.

Patience

So there was this one time when God told me to be patient. Little did I know how serious he in fact was about that. Little did I know what a blessing this would be in my life. But guess what? Patience is still hard. It's hard to sit back, and let it all happen. It's hard to wait. But knowing that God knows best, and that he has a plan for me, one that equals happiness is what gets me through. So I'll hang in there; I'll be patient; I'll have faith. I love him. He loves me. It all works out. God lives. Thank you, and goodnight.

Progression

Christmastime has come again. I can't believe how much has happened in a year. It was quite the year, my friends. Quite the year. And as I look into 2010, I can only imagine how much is going to change still. It never ceases to amaze me how much our Father in Heaven loves us. He teaches us in the ways that teach our minds as well as our hearts. He stretches us in ways we never thought we could. He molds us into the sons and daughters we are destined to become. Now granted, progression isn't always the funnest of activities. Sometimes it pulls your heart out. Sometimes it pulls your hair out. Sometimes it makes you want to punch someone in the face. But everytime, when "what has to be has been," it makes you thank your Lord and maker for his goodness and mercy for helping you to become that which you never thought you could have. He has taken a peice of coal and turned it into a diamond. Truly, we are all precious jems in his sight, thanks to his infinite love and wisdom. Thank goodness for the atonement that makes us more each day. Thank goodness for our Heavenly Father's perfect plan; a plan of happiness; a plan of redemption; a plan of peace. How I love God. How I love his plan for me. How I love his children. How I love progression. Thank you, and goodnight.

Here's to You, 2009

So I have decided that this year has been good to me. I learned a lot. A whole lot. I experienced a ton. As per usual, it was a year of ups and downs, goods and bads where ultimately the good always outweighs the bad. I've been doing a bit of introspection lately, one of my favorite things to do... and realized that I have grown more in this last year than I ever thought I possibly could. I found myself this year- it was quite a lovely discovery. Indeed, looking back this time last year is almost a laughable thing, simply because of how much I have changed. And then as I look into how much is going to change in the next year, I know that I will be laughing still. Thank goodness that this life is all about progression. Thank goodness I can look back on this past year, grateful for everything that happened. It all helped me learn, love and grow. I'm better because of it. So here's just a little smattering of all that happened this past year:

Fell in love with Orlando.

Interned for Disney World.

Met some celebrities.

Dressed like a Grandma for work at Epcot. Sexy.

Had my first taste of missionary work.

Ate lots of sushi.

Danced it out on numerous occasions.

Went hotel hot tubbing.

Caught a gator with my bare hands.

Danced it out Disney style.

Met Mickey Mouse when Kinsey came to visit.

Had my bridal shower at the Grand Floridian. You heard me.

Watched the NBA Finals and had some intense Kobe faces.

Went on many a Wendy's run.

Dressed like a paleontologist for work at Animal Kingdom.

Spooned with Dale.

Went to the beach with my lovelies often.

Ate the Kitchen Sink on the 4th of July.

Used my swimsuit to death.

Met a Pez dispenser.

Went to Warped Tour, and almost died in a Mosh Pit.

Turned 21, went to a real bar...and ordered Shirley Temples...

Discovered Twistee Treat.

Slummed it with Obama.

Went to the fair with my family.

Finally got my face painted.

Discovered that California beaches are much colder than Florida beaches.

Went to a firetruck parade.

Turned in my mission papers, and got called to Billings, Montana.

Went back to school.

Survived Mass Media.

Made lots of friends.

Fell in love with a boy.

Said lots of goodbyes.

Went to a tractor parade.

So here's to you, 2009. Thank you, and goodnight.

Y Chromosome

Okay, so the past three days have found me more offended than I have been in quite a long time. Perhaps offended is the wrong word. I don't normally get offended. I think being offended is a stupid choice.I just get passionate. And by passionate I mean I get mad- some of the time. This was one of those times. What caused said passion and anger? Well, I attend BYU-Idaho. Indeed, it is a wonderful place. Some jokingly refer to it as "The Lord's University." Well I have a thing or two to say to those people. The Lord loves his daughters, and does not appreciate when proud, chauvinistic men demean and degrade them, thank you very much. In the past two days I have taken more hits on my current state as a woman than I remember in quite a while. Last time I checked there was nothing wrong with not possessing said blessed Y chromosome, and to all those of you out there who consider me defective, or dare I say it, inferior, I say in the most lady like way possible: eat it sucka. The other day in my English class we watched a youtube video entitled, "Women, know your limits." Look it up. I dare you. It taught a supposedly valuable lesson. Women apparently should never express their thoughts out loud. Instead, we are expected to keep quiet about such things as politics, the environment, sports, the economy and other such intellectual conversations. How cute that a woman has an opinion, but how foolish of her to share it. Well here I am. I am sharing my opinion: You are an arrogant, male chauvinistic pig. I'd like to have a battle of wits with you any day. I understand that this was a joke. I am sensible enough to know that this was intended to make people, mostly male, laugh. (Yes, I know I am a woman, but women have their moments of sensibility too. Shocker, I know.) However, my professor continued to tell all of the women to "know their place." Whether it be in getting dessert, or expressing their opinions, he never once refrained from reminding me what my supposed place was. I was fully under the impression that my so-called place was at the side of a man. Neither in front or behind him, thank you. Yet I am perfectly capable of standing all by myself. It's pretty awesome. I don't need a man to tell me where my place is. Oddly enough I am more than capable of figuring it out for myself. Thank you. It's situations like these and countless others that occur in rapid succession all over campus that absolutely infuriate me. I am woman. Hear my passion. And guess what? I wrote all of that by myself; without the help of a man. I suppose your wretched little Y chromosomes are overrated after all. Thank you, and goodnight.

I'm an Adult

This got me through thick and thin, good and bad. This will make you smile. A little bit a lot.



Thank you, and goodnight.

Vows

I, Emmilie Buchanan, hereby solemnly promise that in 12 years, when I take engagement pictures, I will never take pictures by the railroad tracks. Also, I promise to never take a picture with an awkward couple pose, unless it is done so mockingly. This I swear on pain of death. Thank you, and goodnight.

Anthem

There's surely somewhere a lowly place in earth's harvest field so wide,
Where I may labor through life's short day for Jesus, the Crucified.
So, trusting my all to thy tender care, and knowing thou lovest me,
I'll do thy will with a heart sincere,
I'll be what you want me to be.

I'll go where you want me to go, dear Lord,
Over mountain or plain, or sea;
I'll say what you want me to say, dear Lord,
I'll be what you want me to be.

Thank you, and goodnight.

Failure.

BYU-Idaho makes finals hard. They don't have a 24 hour library. Fail. They also don't sell caffeinated beverages on campus. Double fail. So instead I shall pray. Please bless that I can finish my 15 page paper- yes the one I just started- by tomorrow at 10:15. Thank you, and goodnight.

Perfect World

In a perfect world, Joseph Gordon Levitt would be my boyfriend. Just saying. Thank you, and goodnight.

Sass You

Sometimes I feel like I live my life on a sassy meter. Today, I'm averaging from anywhere between an 8.7 to a 9.4. Yeah, watch out. I'll sass you. It's the kind of night that I have to remind myself that Christmas means the birth of Jesus, so I can't make sarcastic comments about it. It's the kind of night when you are more likely to get an eye roll from me than a smile. It's the kind of night where I won't hold back, I'll tell you how I really feel, and I'll look you dead in the eye when I do it. It's the kind of night when I just might punch you in the face. It's the kind of night where I have a witty, generally biting comment for everything. Oh, don't misunderstand me. I'm not mad. In fact I feel great. Just about 5.2 points more sassy than normal. Don't worry about it. It's fine. Just enjoy this, and if you are inclined to take things personally, I'll just talk to you tomorrow. Peace it. Thank you, and goodnight.

Desires of My Heart

Pretty sure I wish I was black. Then I could sing amazing. This is not a new desire. After I saw Dreamgirls how long ago? I was convinced that I wanted to be black. Yep. It's true. But alas, I am nothing but a white girl, and will never be fully awesome. So here's to all you divas out there. Sing is sister, just sing it. Thank you, and goodnight.

More Truth

Once again, it was time to press the refresh button on my life. It was time to snap out of it. It was time to look up. It was time to step forward, and with hope walk towards what God has called me to do. I read this scripture this morning, and it filled my soul with peace.

"Wherefore, ye must press forward with a steadfastness in Christ, having a perfect brightness of hope, and a love of God and of all men. Wherefore, if ye shall press forward, feasting upon the word of Christ, and endure to the end, behold, thus saith the Father: Ye shall have eternal life." 2 Nephi 31:20

All is well.

Thank you, and goodnight.

Truth

I still love him.

Thank you, and goodnight.

Snowmen

Okay, so this is funny. Today I was at work. That's not so funny, but this part is: I was proctoring in the Music Room. The Music Room is great for many reasons. One of which being that it has windows. You can look out them, and know that the sun still does shine even when you are in such a wretched place. It's fine. Today, I look out of said windows and what do I behold? The sun? Well yes. Also, I saw a 7-foot tall snowman walking, yes walking across the quad. Um, what? Yes. I am right. It was one of the most bizarre things I have ever seen in my life. I ran to the window, and stared in a sense of warped fixation. It was one of those moments where you worry about yourself, because you are in fact watching a 7-foot snowman go for a little stroll. There were two girls walking towards the snowman, and they looked just as baffled as I felt. The snowman just offered a little wave to them. They laughed, and kept walking. For about 47.3 seconds after the snowman passed out of sight, I stood there staring. That had just happened. Still, I cannot fully fathom what the crap that was. But there you go. Then I laughed out loud. Thank you, and goodnight.

-30

Do you know how cold it is outside? Too bloody cold. It's around this time in the semester that I stop leaving my house unless I absolutely have to. I always plan to leave, and go back to the library in hopes of being more productive. But then I walk home through the frozen-cold-19-degree tundra. "No way." I think to myself. I'm never leaving again. So then all I can do is have a hope and a prayer that I'll be able to motivate myself from my nice toasty bedroom. Please bless. Please bless. I hate the cold so much. Montana, here I come. Today some girl from there told me that on average it gets to be about -30. That's totally awesome. I'm terrified. Remember that one time I lived in a place that had an average of -30? That place was called Minnesota. Remember all of the horrible things that happened there? Yeah... that will be so great. God will bless me, right? It's fine. Thank you, and goodnight.

Tender Mercies

"...But Behold, I, Nephi will show unto you that the tender mercies of the Lord are over all those whom he hath chosen, because of their faith, to make them mighty even unto the power of deliverance." 1 Nephi 1:20

These past few weeks have been filled with tender mercies. Tender mercies come in the form of friends, encouraging words, validation, bishops, mission calls, phone calls, priesthood blessings, peace, fortuitous meetings, not having to sit alone, groceries, sister missionaries, family, words of affirmation, pumpkin pie, service, outlets.

God loves me so much. God loves me enough to give me hard things. God loves me enough to send tender mercies. God loves me enough to tell me no. God loves me enough to send me to Montana. God loves me enough to fulfill promised blessings. God loves me enough to reconfirm my faith whenever it starts to waver.

God is great. God is merciful. God is just.

Thank you, and goodnight.

Love

I love so many things in the world. David Beckham is one of them. Also, awkward moments. Thank you, and goodnight.