Saturday, February 28, 2009

Party in Your Mouth

So today we went to Cici's. And as always, it was sweet. They played the same crappy music that gets forever jammed into the inner-workings of your brain, and refuses to come out, so all you are left with is a stomach full of pizza and a song like "Ring My Bell," replaying in your mind. It's sweet. They have to coolest people there too. You have the guy and his wife that come there every Saturday around 3:00, and holy crap, do they know how to party. We'll call him Dwayne. Dwayne knows how to get things done. He knows what he likes, and he works it out. Dwayne is the guy that orders a whole taco pizza just for him. He has to use a fork to make sure that all of that lettuce, cheese and tomato stays on the slice from the pan to the mouth. You don't want to miss out on any of that action. You go, Dwayne. Meanwhile, Dwayne's wife, let's call her Kathy (with a K.) Kathy has a smattering of everything spread over three or four plates, and while Dwayne is working on his own pie, Kathy is sampling it all. These two are serious. Don't even mess. Then you have my favorite guy there. We'll call him Charlie. Now Charlie brings a smile to my face just thinking about it all because Charlie has mastered the art of the buffet. Charlie is the guy that realizes he is hungry for pizza around 1:57 p.m.. What does Charlie do? Charlie rounds up the wife, and heads to Cici's. Why? Because Charlie can get a plate full of pizza and a huge coke for the low price of $7.23. That's a total of $14.46 for Charlie and the wife. Can life get better? Charlie begs to differ. Upon entering, Charlie carefully, and meticulously bypasses the salad bar, (Who has time for that crap?) as well as the pasta bar, and heads right for the table with the 16 different selections of pizza. Charlie carefully places 16 pieces of pizza onto two plates, and rocks it back to his seat. On his way back to his seat, Charlie glares down all of the innocent guests who cannot help but stare at this awesome hunk of manhood with his towering plates of pizza. Watch out. His glare seems to say, "I like pizza. Don't mess with me." It was awesome, and I laughed out loud. And I wanted to be friends with Charlie. This is what happens at Cici's. Now you know. Thank you, and goodnight. 

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Waffle House of Love

I have a couple passions in life. Writing. Family. Excellent films. Making people happy. Pandora. Converse. And the Waffle House. If you have never been to the south, you are missing out on this great and wonderful world of well, grease. It may sound disgusting, but don't be deceived. It is really quite glorious. It's this little run-down restaurant that is absolutely wonderful. It is gross and disgusting, but you don't mind. Ever. It is an all-American experience. There is a beat-up old jukebox in the corner that plays crappy music that someone somewhere though was "hip." Hits such as "Beautiful," by Christina Aguilera, and "Toxic," by Brittany Spears are among the selection, as well as some patriotic country and the best of Garth Brooks. It's so awesome. You walk into this place of glory, and pick any little booth. Or you can sit at the counter. It's sweet. And one day, I too will grace my presence at the counter. A waitress named Flo, Deb, Pam, or Rita comes to greet you, and is frequently calling you "Hun," "Baby," "Sugar," or "Sweetie." It's sweet! Then you order something disgusting that will probably clog your arteries, but dude, whatever. It's so good! The omelets are filled with a cheese that you don't even really think is cheese, but it's so good you don't even care. The waffles are amazing, and the hash browns are divine. (Even if there is rat fur in the Ketchup. Thanks Shaun!) It is a brilliant idea. And I love the Waffle House with all of my heart. And I have only ever seen them in the south!! (Except for a couple times randomly in Phoenix... whatever.) I highly recommend that everyone should go to the Waffle House at least once before they die. It's amazing, and it will change your life too. Thank you, and goodnight. 

Current Status: NOT Complicated

So after talking to some great people, and pretty much venting to them my life, I have come to a conclusion. I am done with craptastic dating. I have put up with crappy dates for the last four years of my dating life, and now I am done. (Okay, so some of them have been really fun, but there was just no spark... whatever.) And now, I am much more honest, and use the phrase, "No." more than I ever have. I don't have to go out with creeps anymore! It's sweet! I'm done dating people who are super awkward, or creepy, or are just not for me! It's so freeing! I heart it. But I came to this little conclusion. My current outlook on dating is like a family. No really, just hear me out. All of these poor hopeful guys that are trying to ask me out are like all the kids that choose to knock on Mom's door within 4 minutes of each other. The last kid gets mom's full wrath because she is sick and tired of having her door knocked on, and being asked some stupid question. Which is sad for the poor kid because he probably only wanted to ask for a piece of toast, but after annoyance after annoyance, Mom will have none of it. So sorry all of you poor guys that want a piece of toast. No toast for you! Or soup. Honesty is great, and I honestly am done. Thank you, and goodnight. 

Tuesday, February 24, 2009


sarah-palin-1.jpg       album.php.jpg

Okay, so I have more of a technical question. Do you see any type of resemblance? I only ask this due to the fact that over five people have told me that I look exactly like her. And while these two pictures my not capture the full likeness, it's enough to give you an idea, right? My second day of work here in Orlando was full of people telling me that I looked exactly like Sarah Palin. It wouldn't be weird if you have one odd ball telling you you look like some famous person. (I was once told that I look like Jennifer Aniston's twin. But it was in a dark movie theatre. And I'm pretty sure he was just lonely. As well as intoxicated. But that's another story entirely. It's fine.) Anyways, my point is that I have had multiple people, on multiple days tell me that I look just like Sarah Palin! It's so weird! And interestingly enough, it's mostly on days when I wear my glasses... so maybe that's it. But I don't really know. I do know, however, that it has caused a few great punch lines to be taken advantage of among me and my peeps. Thank you, politics. I just think it's bizarre/funny. Welcome to my life. Thank you, and goodnight. 


So do you want to hear my latest stress out? I'll tell you no matter what. Deal with it. So I decided to extend. I love Orlando, and I love the thought of being able to stay here four extra months!!! I know with every little ounce of Emmilie within me that I am supposed to be here. That is a pretty sweet feeling not going to lie. However comma, there is a little snag. And it has an ugly name that sounds a lot like Insurance. I hate it. And ever since things have changed a little bit with whatnot and all of that, I am finding myself without insurance...especially because of my current student state. If I go back to BYU-I, I will be considered a full time student, and all of my woes will cease. I will have insurance again because the Insurance God's have said so. However, if I defer, I will not be considered a full time student, and therefore I shall weep. Why you may ask? Because I won't be able to stay here in Orlando. That would be the worst day of my life. Like for real. So we'll see how it goes. 

In my heart, I know that it is all going to work out. And I feel that I have received enough direction and guidance from the Lord telling me that my place is here. So I know that SOMETHING is bound to work out. It's just the getting there that likes to stress me out. I love this place! I love this ward! I have never felt at home in a place so fast in my entire life. I just fit here, and I can be myself. It's so awesome. And until then, I can learn more about faith. I heart the Lord and his plan for each of us. Thank you, and goodnight.

Sunday, February 22, 2009

Just For the Record

Okay, so I just need to get this out on the table. I am not a FLOOZIE!!!!! I know that there are some of you who would beg to differ, and have many times thought of me as such, and all I have to say is this: Don't look at me in that tone of voice. You heard me. Does it really benefit you to know every aspect of my dating life? (Or the lack thereof...depending on the day and the number of Moroccans in the room...that was not a racial slur thank you very much Jordan Bowman.) I mean, really. How is Emmilie's life so thrilling? Please, let me know. And in the mean time, shut it. 

So, for the record:

  • I am NOT dating Shaun Mayo. 
  • There is nothing going on between me and that nice Italian boy.
  • I am not dating anyone in the ward.
  • No, I really am not dating Shaun.
  • I promise there is NOTHING going on.
  • I am a very outgoing person...this does not mean that I am a pathological flirt! 
  • I am probably NOT trying to get with him. (Whoever you may think fit the profile of "him." 
  • I just a friendly person!!! Okay? Freak!!!
  • Deep down, I really think that boys have cuties, and I am probably just scared of them! I'm not trying to get with every guy I meet! It's fine!
  • I am perfectly happy, accepting and content with my current single status. 
  • And I really am not dating Shaun. 
Oh, and P-freakin'-S what exactly is your definition of "going on"? That's what I want to know! And no. I am not a floozie. Thank you, and goodnight. 

Wednesday, February 18, 2009


I hate internal moral struggles/dilemas with all of my heart. Can I just say that. I would so much rather just always know what I am supposed to do. That would make my life fan-freakin'-tastic. But alas, this life is all about progressing, so I guess I'll go progress some more. What is the latest moral dilema you may ask? Well, I'm trying to decide if I should extend the college program to August or not. I don't know what to do. And the more I think about it, the more good things I find about it, as well as more things that could potentially cause a problem with either this or that. (Ambiguous enough for you?) I just don't even know!

It's times like this that I am so grateful for the gospel of Jesus Christ. I am so grateful that I can pray to my Heavenly Father, and he can guide me. Now all I have to do is listen. But the getting there is the part that stresses me out. Don't even worry about it. It's fine. And until I make what could potentially end up being something like an important decision, I will just keep praying and having faith. Thank you, and goodnight. 

Tuesday, February 17, 2009

Chip & Dale

Okay, so I hope this isn't ruining the magic too much for you, but just suck it up princess. So once upon a time, I was clocking in for work. It was a magical moment, and I was pondering all of the ways I could possibly avoid getting stalked/hit on by creepy men. (It's turning into a game. It's fine.) While in this moment of deep thought and reflection, I happen to look up as Dale, as in Chip and Dale, walks past the glass door ahead of me. It was one of those moments that make you check yourself. A giant chipmunk was just moseying on down to the break room for his "bite of cheese," if that is even what chipmunks eat... It was just kind of weird. But it made me laugh, and forget all of my worries about creepy men. Thank goodness. 

This morning was one of those days where all you want to do is lay by the pool and soak up some sun, and yet you find yourself in the back of a restaurant in an old lady outfit. And there is nothing you can do about it. Such was my morning. But as I was walking into work after clocking in, who should pass me again but Chip and Dale. Chip was being very energetic, and having lots of fun. Dale, well, I don't know about Dale but the impression I got was a "Oh, just kill me now," sort of one. God speed. But then it got even better, because Chip then started to sneak up behind Dale with his hands up in the air ready to strike. He started slinking behind him, getting ready to pounce. It would have been a little bit more frightening if he didn't have his face forever fixed into a happy grin, but even still, it was hilarious. I laughed out loud. Chip was stalking Dale. That was the kind of magic I want to see every day. It's so crazy some of the things that go on backstage. And it always makes for great blogging material, so I say bring it on. Thank you, and goodnight. 

Friday, February 13, 2009


I heart expletives like this. And Holy St. Francis. Thank you, and goodnight. 

You Are Here

Okay, so being here in the college program, you see some weird things. But don't worry. It's all good. Just kind of weird. Like today, I was walking home and passed a man in a gorilla suit leaning off the railing on his porch. Just chillin'. It was pretty sweet. I told him hi, and he waved at me. Then I laughed out loud. This little encounter led me to ponder all of the other slightly weird things that seem to occur more often than I actually realize. Like today, when I was on the bus pulling out of Vista Way, there were two guys. And they seemed...close. A little too close. As in, full on embrace which was quickly morphing into full on kiss/make-out. That was cool. And by cool I mean I threw up in my mouth. It's moments like this when I do this thing called freak-out, followed by a sudden moment of realization called, "Oh yeah, I'm not in the bubble anymore." Sweet. In fact, I am in the real world. And it is awesome. Minus the making-out gay men. Thank you, and goodnight. 

Tuesday, February 10, 2009


So my life has now become about 17 different shades of awkward. Yet after some deep reflection, a great deal of story-telling, and much laughter with Jordan D. Bowman, I came to the conclusion that I do in fact love my life. Yeah, it sucks in the moment, and half the time I can't decide between tears and a nice punch to the face, but afterwards, (like a day or two...) when I am retelling my awkward life, it's so hilarious, and so awkwardly typical of me. There are certain aspects that are starting to loose some of the novelty, and just all around suck, but for the most part, awkwardness defines my life, and I love it. I have quite the mental vault of awkward stories, and am beginning to become so bountiful with awkward that I am starting to have a story for every situation. Oh the joys. From impersonating British men, to being stalked by Vietnamese ones, I have it all. The story that goes with your awkward moment. And as you continue to dread those awkward moments that shade your life, I will continue to bask in mine. All 17 of them. Thank you, and goodnight. 

Saturday, February 7, 2009


So I know that I have already blogged on this topic, not the sexy one...ahem. It's fine. I have already blogged about my highly attractive costume, but I would like to add visuals now. The time has come to let you put it all together, and smile as I'm sure you will. 

This is it. This little beauty is what makes the money. No, but for real though. It explains a lot, huh? Okay, so no. It's fine. 

Oh, so this is cool. I go into work one day, and my manager tells me that I have earned the Cast Appreciation and Recognition Award for the month. They told me that I had been doing a great job, and had been going above and beyond. I think it's all because of the vest. Or possibly the pants that are so short that you can see half way up my calf. I don't know, but it's pure awesomeness either way. Eat it. Also please note the Disney Point. Thank you. 

Um, this is for real. As I kill you with my laser eyes. 

As you can see, it is totally glorious. I know you are all jealous. One day, when you grow up, you too can be as cool as me and wear fish vests. Thank you, and goodnight. 


I figured it out. The answer to all of my life's problems. In order to rid myself of the ever-annoying, ever-frustrating, yet ever-entertaining-story-the-day-after, I need this. In order to put an end-all to the problem of creepy boys falling in love with me because I am nice to them, I have to get married. Well, I have to at least be engaged. This way, I have protection in ring form. Because one of the things that makes me the happiest in life is being genuinely nice to people, and letting them see that I care about them. This is a good thing in most situations, however comma, it seems to get me into trouble/sticky dating situations a lot. But, if I have a rock on my finger, those creepy boys will realize that I am in fact taken, and am not interested in them. It means that I'm just a nice person. And therefore they will not get the wrong idea and start asking me out with impressive vigor. And then the universe will once again be at rest, and so will all of my stress. Oh how great. So basically I am saying that I want to be engaged, or even have the appearance of being engaged for purely selfish reasons. Don't judge me harshly. You would too. Thank you, and goodnight. 

Monday, February 2, 2009

The Need for Speed

So last night was Break the Fast, and due to some awesome blessings, I had the day off! Equals, I got to go to Break the Fast! Hooray. Our ward is slightly awesome in the fact that they have set up transportation for all of the CP's. It's pretty sweet. Break the Fast was at 6:30 sharp, so all the CP's gather in the central meeting location, and chillax, (technical term...) waiting for our ride. Well... 6:30 came and went, Break the Fast had started, and we were still standing outside of Chatham. It was cool though. There was some pretty sweet bonding going on. It's fine. Finally around 6:45 some more cars come to get us there. I was with Mila, an investigator to our church, so we hopped in a car together. I was starving, and ready to get there quickly because I had been fasting all day. Did you ever hear that saying, "Be careful what you wish for?" Such were my thoughts as the driver of the car welcomes us into his speed machine from 1979. He was a very nice guy from our ward, and in no time at all informed us that his car was Japanese, and was built for speed. He then invited us into his confidence, and told us not to worry; his Uncle was a Brazilian race car driver, and trained him well. That was kind of a scary moment. Not gonna lie. As we changed lanes with insane speed, my friend Alyssa and I found ourselves gasping and screaming a little more than was actually necessary for a quick little ride to the Stake Center. But after a nice little scenic tour through downtown Orlando, we made it there. Sadly, we were the last ones there, and seeing as it had started 45 minutes ago, most of the food was already gone. But don't even worry. I had some awesome cake, and some veggie lasagna with chicken. (Wrap your head around that one!) It was great. 

Then I was able to go to Gathering with Mila. Gathering is a second sacrament meeting that our ward has every Sunday night for those poor souls who have to work during our regular church hours. We don't mess with eternal salvation around here, folks. It was pretty sweet. It was quick though because of the fireside that night. There was just one slight problem, however. Um, there was no fireside, and somehow the entire ward was under the false impression that Robert D. Hales was going to be speaking to us tonight. It was pure silliness. But after some more social time and some further great bonding, it was all okay. 

I love Sundays so much! They are such happy days. especially the ones with food and Brazilian race car driver prodigies. Thank you, and goodnight. 

Sunday, February 1, 2009

25 Things You May or May Not Already Know...

  1. I love the smell of cedar. 
  2. Pancakes are my favorite thing in the entire world. I would eat them every day if I could.
  3. I have a very strong love for Jazz music. 
  4. Making other people happy makes me happy. 
  5. I love listening to the Pride and Prejudice Soundtrack and Rhapsody in Blue on Sunday.
  6. I find true, and eternal joy in the gospel of Jesus Christ
  7. I love to cook. Especially desserts. And pancakes. 
  8. If I could, I would put peanut butter on everything.
  9. I like remembering the past because it reminds me how far I have come.
  10. I love making other people laugh. 
  11. I like using big words. They make me feel smart.
  12. Bad weather scares me more than anything else. 
  13. I love people watching. 
  14. I like to dance in the streets as people are watching.
  15. I love painting my toes and fingernails.
  16. Sometimes, I get too frustrated with the whole, single and dating concept, and want to skip to the happily married portion of my life. 
  17. I have a secret goal to get on as many quote walls as I possibly can.
  18. The dream of my life is to be a voice actor in an animated movie. Heck. Yes. 
  19. One of my favorite things in the whole world is going to a new city and walking around downtown. 
  20. I love getting dressed up. Also getting dressed up and going out to eat. 
  21. I hate peaches more than anything else in this known world.
  22. I love Magnolia trees, and miss living in Georgia.
  23. I love sharing my testimony, as well as the gospel with those around me. 
  24. I don't like dogs. 
  25. I love big families, and can't wait for my own someday. 
Thank you, and goodnight. 

Called to Serve!

Today I got a calling as a Ward Missionary, and I am so excited, I can't even stand it! I feel so blessed by the Lord. I am reminded of that scripture in Alma that talks about how Alma was so happy in the joy of the Lord that he would boast of the goodness of God...or something to that extent. Basically I'm trying to say that I am so very happy and grateful to a loving Heavenly Father. I know with all of my heart that this is where I am supposed to be, and this is what I am supposed to be doing. How great it is! I have been blessed by the Lord and now I have the blessing of being able to share this gospel that I love with all of my heart! I think that the Lord's plan for each of us is an amazing thing. It puts life into such great perspective, and makes the journey seem easier. How sweet this life is, and how blessed. How I love my Savior with all of my heart. How I love this church. It is true! I could ramble on in happiness about it for hours, but for now I will say: Thank you, and goodnight!!!